The Secret To Enjoying Any Body You Want

If you are a member here I am assuming that you have tried all the diets that are out there. If you were a chronic dieter like me you have probably experienced the thrills of promising a change in your physique. Whether it be keto, vegan, Atkins, or my personal favorite: Weight Watchers. They all started and ended the same. I am not here to speak badly about any of these programs or the companies. I think overall the people who promote these diets are trying to help for the greater good.

When I was at a high weight again after being off off WW (I rejoined over 10 times throughout the years) I finally found intuitive eating. This changed my life. I went through the process outlined in the next chapter to CURE my eating disorder. I was not where I wanted to be in my body but the desire to binge eat leaving my mind and knowing it will never come back was a blessing that frequently brought me to tears. I have spent decades waking up in the morning and praying to god to please not let me binge that day. This controlled 95% of my mind my entire life. Having that space opened up truly changed my world.

Once I eradicated my eating disorder I was finally ready to focus on changing my body for good. I was ready to step into a strong, toned, lean body and know that it was mine forever. I wanted to feel that my dream body was mine with the same certainty that I felt knowing I would never binge again. I knew it was time to get to the root of my beliefs.

But how?

I knew I had to change my beliefs about what it takes to have the body of my dreams. I no longer wanted to believe it was only through documented restriction that I could live in a smaller body. My whole life I reached a lower weight from following programs but it wasn’t always because of my restriction of food. It was my expectation about what was to come. I decided to try to rewire my beliefs by using the feelings that I felt when I was dieting. I didn’t want the negative thoughts and feelings of lack. I wanted to use the positive experiences to create my own beliefs that would sculpt my reality.

So how do diets reel us in anyway?

It all starts with the knowledge phase. This is where you learn about the new diet and their research about how/why they work. You are immediately filled with the exhilarating feeling of hope for the future. You think, “Maybe this will work for me! This all makes so much sense. Look at the amazing results other people have had.”

Enjoying the promise is the next phase that we are going to use to our advantage. When starting a new diet you feel the buzz of change and the assurance that your dream body is coming. It is all you have been looking for. There is nothing that feels better than creating a new belief about what is going to happen to your body because of what you have been told. This is why when you are three days into a diet you already feel leaner. You may feel more in control of your life and your future. In reality, the first few days nothing has changed outside of your mind. You are adjusting your belief system all on your own.

The next step would be either a quick quit or a lifestyle change. There were diets that I tried that only lasted under a week because for me they were almost impossible to sustain. I think my record for shortest diet was a juice cleanse and I believe I never made it past lunchtime on day 1. I have also fallen out of other diets containing shakes instead of food and restricting carbohydrates rather quickly. These are just not sustainable. I completed a few Whole30 cleanses in Januarys because I knew that it was only for 30 days. However immediately after I went back to eating all my normal foods. The only “semi-sustainable” diet I ever did was Weight Watchers a.k.a. WW. I say sustainable because I was on it on/off for over 10 years and for 3 of those years I was my “perfect” weight. I weighed 130 pounds and started somewhere around 180 pounds. WW did help me become successful in losing weight over time because it was easy to follow. Having to track points made me mindful of what I was eating and the fact that I could enjoy fruits or vegetables whenever I wanted felt like “food freedom” to me. Once again though I gained all the weight back and more over the next few years. This is because I stopped tracking and I never got to the root of my binge eating disorder. There was always a fear inside me that the dam I had holding my desire to binge would someday burst. It is incredibly important to note that I did not change my eating habits one bit when quitting WW. After tracking for a few years I was used to my standard breakfasts, protein lunches, salads, and restaurant orders. I didn’t just quit tracking and decide that I was going to live off gas station food and alcohol. I ate very similarly to how I was eating before. I was living the exact same way and I was even training for a few marathons and was very active. However, I still began to gain weight. I know I gained the weight back (and more) because it was my thoughts that tracking what I was eating kept me in my perfect body. So when I stopped tracking it was my expectation that I would gain weight, and gain weight I did.

The universe always says “Yes.”

Another reason WW was not a complete lifestyle was that I continued to experience binge eating disorder the entire program. I would always feel that pull to the danger foods and feel completely out of control or helpless around them. I was the person who “couldn’t have that in the house.”

So I decided that I was going to be my own Guinea pig and step into my dream body without any dieting, tracking, or restriction of any kind. I am going to show you how you can follow me to do exactly the same. I used this method to continue to live my life eating anything I want and feeling increasingly happy about my body.

Here we are going to use those feelings of excitement to change everything.

Step #1: Create your new belief. Whatever you want to be true and provide evidence. Believe with all your heart that this promise will come true.

My mantra which I would repeat all day and never stray away from was, “I am meant to be in this small, lean, and toned body no matter what I eat.”

Now we have to provide some evidence: I knew this was true because when I was tracking on WW at my smallest weight I was less active than I am now, I would drink more alcohol, and enjoy the same foods. I would even binge every once in awhile when I felt out of control. However, I was tracking which helped me maintain the belief that my 130 pound body would stay with me as long as I tracked.

It is easy to feel distracted by the beliefs you hold that have been told to you on repeat your entire life such as:

• Calories in calories out

• It is so hard to lose weight as you age or after children

• Genetically you are meant to be overweight

We are going to stray away from these. When you have a death grip on these phrases your mind is focusing on the wrong things.

Regarding the science of calorie counting. It is true that a caloric deficit will lead to weight loss. It is true that people do underestimate the amount that they are eating by 30-50% when making assumptions about portion sizes. That is the idea behind calorie counting. I understand this as a scientific fact for weight loss. The program I created does essentially the same thing being mindful and choosing things that fuel and make your body feel good while enjoying soul foods in moderation. My program does EXACTLY the same thing….but with a better plan. The moderation (which most people interpret as restriction) is actually your own common sense that we have been told we don’t have. This is simply not true. If you have ever overeaten and felt the discomfort physically….you have it. When you step back from the dieting, the numbers, the restrictions, you are then able to use your true wisdom to make the choices that will lead you to that amazing physique you have always wanted. Even better, you will be able to enjoy that body and know that it is never going anywhere because it was never created within the parameters of a diet. When you are dieting you are never learning how to live without the diet and there will always be a fear of “losing” it. With my program you will see your new amazing physique and lifestyle as certain and unchanging as your eye color. Why would it change? This is who you are.

This theory of mine is similar to the differences in exercises. You could burn 300 calories by running if you would like. To some people that may sound like a horrendous idea because it is not in their interest. Imagine now that you told them they could only run for exercise and also limit themselves to only 30 minutes on the couch everyday. Now they are forced to do something they don’t like and something they enjoy is now limited. That makes the odds of them going out for their run and limiting time on the couch very unlikely whilst damaging their connection to their bodies true desire for movement. Lets say instead you ask that same person if they would mind either rollerskating, dancing, swimming for 45 minutes, or whatever else interests them. They could burn those same 300 calories doing something they actually enjoy and as a side effect they spend less time on the couch. That is the theory behind my entire program. Asking you who you want to be, what you like to do, and how you would like to feel. When you become someone who spends their life feeling happy and physically well, the amazing body will come on it’s own to match your mind.